BRUCE BORKOSKY

I was 27, married to my first love, and our marriage was on it's last legs. It was quite difficult for me, and I was really struggling with the loss. I happened upon a psychologist and decided to try psychotherapy, just to see if it would help. Couldn't hurt, I guessed. Well, to my surprise, after two years of therapy, it was as if the stones were lifted from my eyes! The marriage didn't survive, of course, but I was able to say that I was truly happy with myself and happy being alone. If I ended up marrying again (which, of course, I did), that would be fine, and if I didn't that would also be fine. I learned to deeply understand other people and how to create true intimacy in my relationships with them. I knew that this was a new path for me - helping other people the same way I had been helped.

Yes, therapy can, at times, be uncomfortable. I mean, you are pouring your heart out to a stranger, right? Telling him your deepest, darkest secrets. You wonder if he will understand, if he will judge you, or even use those things against you in some way. Also, sometimes there are difficult feelings to get through. Memories that we just wish would go away. Thoughts that interrupt even the most pleasant times. Never fear! Those 'bad' thoughts are feelings are but temporary, and the telling of your story usually leads to a sense of relief. Heck, just knowing that someone cared enough to listen can make all the difference in the world. After awhile, you will find yourself putting your past in the past, able to live fully in the present.